The Big 3

Three years ago to the hour I became a mommy when our sweet Katie girl entered this world.

This little girl changed my life and I can't believe she is already three years old.  For some reason I am having a harder time with this birthday than I have with any of the others.  I think it is because she now is more of a little lady than a toddler.  She can do so many things on her own.  We can have complete conversations and she asks questions and REALLY inquires about the world around her.  I have even noticed a change in her big sister attitude.  She likes to help Carly do things and is very patient even when Carly is pulling her hair or grabbing toys out of her hands. 

First Birthday

13 months

2 1/2 years old

2nd birthday

3 years old

Happy Birthday sweet girl!  We love you so much.

Enjoying the Moment

I love this smile.  It appears all throughout the day but gets really big when big sister or daddy shows up.  My little girls is one very happy baby.... 99% of the time.  But yesterday happened to be one of those 1% days.   For some reason she didn't nap well and so from 3:00 until she went to bed at 6:30 she was a very fussy, grumpy girl.  But we survived and she slept 12 hours last night so I am hoping this morning she will wake up like this....

 

or like this

See what I mean...that smile is contagious but so is the grumpiness.  

Last night, I was really struggling to stay patient with my children but after many deep breaths and a walk down the street hand in hand with my first born, I felt much better.  Now today is a new day and everyone always feels better after a good nights sleep, especially mommy.   

Today is our library day which Katie gets very excited about.  This girl loves to read!

She also loves her new horse that Papa pulled out of the attic.  This was Jeff's horse when he was little and although Katie doesn't understand that at all yet, it is a very special addition to our home.  

The horse doesn't have a name yet but we are working on it.  For some reason Katie doesn't name anything.  She loves her babies but they are all just called "babies". 

Happy Thursday.  Live in the moment and enjoy every bit of it! 

So Much to Love

I love watching my baby girl drift off to sleep in my arms.  I was always scared to let Katie do that because I was afraid of how it might mess up her routine.  Now, with Carly I know this will be the last time I get that chance so I say forget the routine and just enjoy the moment.  My heart bursts every time her little body relaxes completely and her eyes get so heavy she just can't keep them open any longer.  That is one of my favorite moments of the day.

I love watching Carly laugh with Katie.  She lights up as soon as Katie smiles at her and now they are even starting to "talk" to each other.  On Friday we were driving to day care and Carly woke up before we got there which she rarely does.  Next thing I know I hear Katie's little voice telling Carly all about the trees outside the window, how mommy has to concentrate on the road (I tell her that when I just don't have the energy to carry on a conversation with a 2 year old at 6:45am), and how she is going to have cereal for breakfast at Sharry's.  It was so fun to hear them chatting and interacting together.   It won't be long before they really start playing together...I can't wait!

I also love Saturday mornings.  I love not having to rush out the door or get dressed right away.  This past weekend we let the girls stay in their pj's and I wanted to get a picture of them.  Here is what happened.  

Carly is so excited to be sitting next to her big sister

So happy she just wants to eat Katie's knee

Katie: "don't eat my knee Carly!" and off she goes.  Poor Carly is left hanging

and Mommy is left with one sister in her striped pj's

Being a mom is the best but during those times when I am stressed out and overwhelmed, I just remind myself they are only little once.  The writer of this wonderful blog I read called Enjoying the Small Things also helps me remember that.  She is a beautiful photographer, inspirational writer, and a loving mom.  Her youngest daughter, Nella, has down syndrome and she is raising money for the National Down Syndrome Society.  She wrote a very touching entry about it and I encourage you to check it out.  I always find that her blog helps me remember what is important in this crazy life....family!

One of Those Days

I think we have hit the terrible two's at the Garner household.  My sweet, very verbal, and oh so compliant Katie is changing on us.  She has become a very emotional little girl who has a major meltdown over the smallest things.  I don't know if it is because Daylight Savings time totally messed with her internal clock and she has been getting one hour of less of sleep because she has been waking up at 5:30 am.  Or if it is because her new 4 month old sister has been taking up a lot of mommy's attention lately.   Or maybe it is just being almost two and trying to figure out to navigate the world around her.  Whatever the reason, it has been one of those days where I just want a break.  I would love to go for a nice long walk by myself, stop somewhere and get coffee, and maybe even go shopping for a few hours without worrying about if we will get home in time for Carly's next feeding.

I know every mom has days like this so I just keep reminding myself that this is part of motherhood.  Luckily my day improved dramatically when Jeff surprised me by coming home for lunch.  He ate with us and then did all of the dishes which was fabulous.  And the best part of the day was when Katie made Carly laugh.  I was holding Carly in my lap and Katie just started giggling.  Next thing I know Carly busts out laughing too.  Carly has giggled a few times before but we have never heard Carly laugh like that.  In those short two minutes, my mood completely changed and I realized that moments like that are rare and that I need to just soak it all in which is exactly what I did. 

What a Day

Being a mommy means you have good days and bad days and while most of our days are great, yesterday was one where Jeff stopped by the house and found all three of us in tears.

It started out with Carly blowing out of her night time diaper and me changing her bedding and doing my first load of laundry at 5:30 am. Then about 20 minutes after her first feeding she throws up all over her bouncy seat, the floor, and my leg....laundry load #2. Of course soon after that when I am trying to get Katie's breakfast ready, I proceed to spill coffee all over the table, the floor, and my leg. Things are not looking good at this point but I try and stay positive.

We make it through a few peaceful hours but then Katie wants to go outside and I have to feed Carly so she proceeds to get into everything she knows she isn't supposed to. Just when I am about to break out her favorite DVD, "Signing Time", Carly finishes and I get Katie's shoes on and we head out the door. Not two minutes later Carly throws up all over the deck! I have never seen such a little person project so much. Thank goodness we were outside because it would have been awful inside. At this point I am full of puke and on the verge of tears, Katie is crying because she doesn't want to go inside, and Carly is miserable and obviously sick. Thank goodness for grandparents next door! I drop Katie off at their back door and go inside to clean up. And just when I think the morning couldn't get any worse, Carly poops all over the changing table AND somehow manages to get it on the wall too. This is when Jeff walks in, gives me a big hug, and tells me what a good mom I am.

Luckily the afternoon improved because nap time came, Carly kept her food down, and I was able to take a much needed shower. We aren't sure what made Carly sick but the doctor said it could have been a reaction from her shots. I am just glad it is over and last night she slept a full 9 hours again! Thank goodness because after the day I had, 7 hours of continuous sleep felt wonderful. Ahhh, the joys of motherhood.

Daddy and his girls after mommy's bad day

Friday morning update: She puked again twice this morning! We didn't go to the doctor yesterday because she seemed better but I am calling again this morning. I just don't know what is going on with poor Miss Carly. It's almost like she is eating too much on an empty stomach now that she is sleeping through the night. Times like this are when I wish babies could tell us how they feel.

Off Work and Home Alone

It is Tuesday morning, I am home alone, and it feels very weird. Friday was my last day of work but I still took Katie to Sharry's today. I feel like a bad mommy but then again I know she loves it there and I am sure she is having more fun playing with her friends than she would have been running errands with me. Plus it's good to keep the same routine...right? Ok, I have talked myself out of the guilt and will enjoy what could possibly be my last relaxing day for a while. Therefore, I am going to put my feet up, get caught up on my pregnancy journal, watch last nights episode of the Bachelorette, take a nap, and make dinner all without little toddler interruptions. Although, I have to admit it is VERY quiet and I do actually miss the constant chatter of Lil Miss.

And speaking of Lil Miss her language is exploding and we are loving the conversation. Yesterday I caught her in her room sitting on her rocking chair "reading" books out loud. It was the cutest thing and I tried to get it on video but of course she noticed me and stopped. She also will talk to her babies and lately, one of her favorite things is to tell Ozzie "no, mine!"

She also loves musical instruments, especially grandma's piano. On Sunday Jeff took her next door to visit grandma and and grandpa while I got some house cleaning done and this is what happened:

This is such a fun age and I can't wait to have two little girls running around, talking, laughing, and playing together. Our little family of four will be complete soon.

Life is About to Change

Katie is off schedule and taking a morning nap which she hasn't done in a while so I am taking advantage of the time and getting caught up on some blogging. I am 36 1/2 weeks along and I feel like baby Carly could come into this world any day now. While I want her to keep "baking" for a few more weeks, I am also ready for this pregnancy to be over. It's hard being this pregnant while also being mommy to a 17 month old. I want my body back or at least a somewhat normal body back. I know it is going to take me longer and be more work to get back into the same shape I was before Katie was born, but I am ready to start trying. I am also ready to meet this precious little girl and have our Garner family complete.

The month of June will be a wonderfully busy one as Jeff and I will celebrate our 3 year wedding anniversary on the 9th, I will turn 31 on the 7th, and at some point this month we will celebrate the birth of our second daughter. Luckily, I am feeling much more prepared now after Jeff's vacation week. We accomplished a lot and if Carly were to come today we would be ready.

As I become a mommy to my second precious baby girl, I am constantly reminded of the loss of my mom and the grandma my girls will never know. This past week I was at a workshop for work and the presenter played a song from an album titled "Between Heaven and Earth". The name of the song was Better than I've Ever Been and the lyrics made me cry because it spoke to me so closely.

(People say) that I'll never be the same
That's true-no doubt
But I know more now what life is about

I laugh louder
Cry harder
Take less time to make up my mind and I
Think smarter
Go slower
I know what I want
And what I don't
I'll be better than I've ever been
Maybe I'll be better than I've ever been.

There's a curious freedom
Rising up from the dark
Some kind of strength I've never had

Though I'd trade it in a second
To have you back
I gotta try to make some good out of the bad.

While I never wanted to lose my mom and I wish with all my heart that she could be here today, I know that I am stronger person because of this experience and I really am "better than I've ever been".

She Makes Me Smile

Every day this little one brings so much joy into my life.

Yes I am feeling very sentimental this morning...blame it on the pregnancy hormones. I have always loved kids and always knew I would be a mom, but I never expected to feel such a deep, unconditional love like I do for my little girl (soon to be girls). Katie is such a sweetheart and every day she is doing something that makes Jeff and I smile and laugh and love her even more. Yesterday she and I were at Costco standing in a ridiculously long line and I was thinking she would have a meltdown any moment because it was close to lunch and nap time. Instead my sweet little girl happily played with the vitamin bottle and said hi to everyone around us. Then when she got bored with that she quietly started sucking her thumb and rested her head on my arm. It made my heart melt! And after standing there for a good ten minutes we were both tired and ready to be home but my little Katie was so patient and sweet and then happily said "hi" to the cashier when it was finally our turn. I love her so much!